20011029

well one thing has got off my mind tonight -- today i should say since it is 12:46 pm on a Monday -- my best friend and i are friends again thank GOD!! I would be so friggin pissed off and sad if we werent. (more sad then pissed)

im an insomniac man, probably cos its so hot. i was wearng cotten pants and a shirt but i was too hot so i changed to a singlet top and shorts. man, and tis only the middle of spring! (imagine what summer would be like! mannnnnnnnn!!)

well anyway, its now 1:59 pm, i spent most of the time surfing the net. oh yeah, hey, added some more reviews and people, can you pleassssssssse vote for me!!!!!!!!!!!!

20011028

you know what the strange thing is? I couldn't eat much yesterday (didn't eat finner) nor today (woke up at 11, but didnt eat lunch). At first I thought I was coming down with anorexia nervosa since I didn't feel like eating ANYTHING (i eventually did eat something but) but then again, im so fat so no.

but yeah, now i know why. it was a sub-conscious reason you know? the reason behind me losing my appetite is probably because of my friend (lets just call her lily because I don't want to betray her trust). I'm scared lily would try something during the weekend. I'm also not the only one fearing this because on Friday, when I took the bus home, I sat next to my friend whom was another good friend of Lily. She had tears in her eyes during the whole bus ride and said she was frightened Lily might try third attempt.

She's not the only one, I know that the rest of us are worried sick about her. I've prayed as much as I can for her and tomorrow, since I'm going to church and it's a Sunday, I'm gonna pray extra hard and hope for the best. Since Lily is a Christian too, she might not try anything tomorrow...but who knows about today?

on a better note, I watched "Ever After" today (it was on TV Channel Ten). It wasn't as good as before I watched it but I taped it anyway. I sense the reason it wasn't as good was because my mind was on Lily. Pray she'll be okay for me please...

20011026

Morning smiles
like the face
of a newborn child,
innocent, unknowing.

Winter's end
promises
of a long lost friend.
Speaks to me of comfort

But I fear
I have nothing to give.
I have so much
to lose here in this lonely place.
Tangled up in your embrace
there's there's nothing I'd like better than
To fall.

updated atm, calender and siblings! I've also started working on my site collective/personal blog plus Petra is gonna move in her personal site and maybe her designs website. Same with Jen =)

Anyways, today must be Black Friday. My best friend tried to commit suicide; my other best friend and I seem to be about to end our friendship; my good friend and I are hardly talk to each other; I still haven't got my Geography test back yet (stupid I know); the school fete was boring. The only highlights was when I got home and got on the computer. the fete had delicious food, but it was a rip off. Another one was cos we had Visual Arts, and Ms. M. was away again so we got a free period and since Yiwen was bored,s he drew my most favourite animal -- a dragon!! It's awesome! I plan to get a huge piece of cardboard, stick the piccy of the dragon up; of my family up; of my friends up and of Benny Chan and maybe Blair McDonough up ^_~ YUMMY!!

but I fear
I have nothing to give.

Wind in time
rapes the flower
trembling on the vine
and nothing yields to shelter
from above.
They say temptation will destroy our love.
The never ending hunger

sigh. nothing will get my mind of my friend who tried to commit suicide. she's suffering greatly from depression and we can't help her so that makes me feel guilty and ashamed and angry and upset. Most of us cried today cos she was this close *fingers help one millimetre apart* to dying. And this is her second attempt.

I swear, I'm not making this up -- it's all true which scares me the most.....

But I fear
I have nothing to give
I have so much
to lose here in this lonely place
tangled up in our embrace
there's nothing I'd like better than
to fall

But I fear
I have nothing to give.
I have so much to lose.
I have nothing to give.
We have so much to lose...


-- Sarah McLachlan, Fear -- This is dedicated to my friend -- don't ever give up, me and the rest of our friends all treasure you and we do give a shit about you.

20011021

yay!!!! i'm so so so so so happy today!! =) I got FOUR sibling sites!!! They're all really really nice people and here they are:

Anna -- InstantInsanity.net
Kate -- DreamsAtRandom.nu
Natasha -- SimplyJessica.net
Britney -- Pop-Princess.net

I suggest you go straight away and see their sites!! ^_^

P.S. I haven't added them yet cos I have to get off and study for a geography test Eek!!

20011020

updated the ATM, fixed the stories section and added two more things to do =)

Anyone up for hosting or being a sibling with me? I sure hope so =)

yesssss!!! new stuff is working fine!

again trying

trying this out.........might not work.........

20011019

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm today is a............saddening, a lil bit complicated day (yes!) and yeah...............

1st period: maths -- BORING!!!!!!!!! but surprisingly, it went by EXTREMELY quickly, probably cos i talked a lot wit lisa, leesa and susie and the fact that we just got back form holida =) anyhow, i'm just glad it's OVER!! (this post is short cos its MATHS, for goodness sakes!!)

2nd period: industrial arts computers -- pretty much okay; we had to type down stuff mr. hair dictated and i kept on looking at michael and kevin cos them two are real fast and i beat them both!! kekeke, and of course, when we had some free time, vanessa and jessica started playing speed as with kevin and michael. of course, kevin kicked butt again

3rd period: history -- i handed in my assignment and i was sooooooooooooo nervous cos u noe why. well anyways, we learnt some more about the medevial times, mostly about king william and the feudalism system, it was actually quite interesting but the system was TOTALLY unfair!!!! peasants get HARDLY anything while the lazy, selfish cunts called lords, knights etc. got heaps HMPH!! oh wells, at least its gone and done with

also, during history i felt near crying cos everyone was ignoring me again.....makes me so so so sad.....i'll talk more later.

4th period: science -- science hmmmm lemme try to remember what happened.........oh crap, oh crap i cant oh wait i can now!! we went to the library to find more stuff about sun devices and it was sooooo fun cos we hardly did anything. jenny found this stuff and photocopied it for all of us (but we had to pay). jessica T, leesa, lisa, diana and i just mucked around and it was completely fun!! listening to the guys talk was funni as well cos they're funni

hehee plus aiman had to crawl under the tables to get out and to get he's hat, then crawl over the tables to get back to he's seat he was smiling and laughing all the way and so were the boys. i had pretended i wasnt watching or anything but i couldnt help but crack up cos it was so funny!! kekeke

oooooooh goota go eat dinner, today we have mcdonalds cos dad worked later yummmmmm, honey mustard!!!!

20011018

hmmmmmmm..........hasnt been much INTERACTING and SIGNING THE G.BOOK!!!

Oh wells, turns our my essay is two pages.......i think it's over the word limit but oh wells....yeh, oh wells.....anyway, christine and vivian says yeah, its pretty much okay, but i need to change some stuff around, but as i quote from christine "it doesn't really what we're saying, but its better to listen cos their....suggestions, not advice, we're not allowed to give that [laughs] so yeah, at then end it's all up to you". she's real nice.

and well, let's recap what i said yesterday about my classes.....seeing the end results of it and if it really was more relaxing.....

1st period: visual arts -- ms. maheljavich (think i spelt it wrong so i'll just call her ms. m) was teaching us again, but she was away so we had ms. brown, yiwen's geography teacher. the period was pretty fun cos we just sat there talked and did stuff. i wrote down parts of lyrics (aint it funny, just the thing etc.); lisa made oragami things (i got to keep a turtle) and yiwen just sat there talking to me.

2nd period: science -- we did do an experiment and i have to admit, the period was kinda fun =) we also had to write up the report, but that was okay and we also had to answer these questions and that was okay to cos they were easy questions. oh yeah, we got our science report marks back and i got a B. that's pretty much okay, actually =)

3rd period: english -- that was fun as well! a lot of the groups took a long time to finish off the ad so we can had the whole period to finish it instead of half of it. our ad sucked i gotta say =P oh wells, oh wells...hehe, that DB in hot30 countdown is so so so funny when he writes in he's diary

4th period: geography -- we had to have it in our english classroom so that was a good thing about geog. see, the A19 (eng. room) seems like the best place to learn anything (especially english) because it appears so big and warm and breezy and airy and fun! anywayz, leesa had a spair seat next to her and she yelled out "lisa! serena! both of you come sit next to me!!" yeah well, lisa was too fast for me and she got there and sat there first. i had to sit in the same table as brooke, candice etc. and I was BORED!!!!! luckily, leesa and lisa came to the rescue and i exchanged letters/notes with leesa and lisa using our silly nicknames (i'm three vowels [eea], leesa is double e [ee, also courtsey of diana for makin it up] and lisa is one eye [i]

kekeke well, im dreading giving the essay in cos im POSITIVE im gonna get an extremely bad mark!! oh well, better not dwell over the past....

okay, okay, bloody HELL!! i promised myself i wouldn't make this a personal diary, but i cant get into my current offline one so i'm gonna write down some personal thoughts (yikes!)

i feel as if brooke and i arents best friends anymore....not even a friend anymore....see, in her friendship book she didnt write ME (nor aiman) as her best friend and she says im her 1st best friend and that makes me feel real sad.

i also feel as if EVERYONE is ignoring me!! (except for diana and our group, leesa and lisa and their group, my family and teachers) i mean, eg. i said something in geog. and nobody replied or anything. bloody hell, dont they know how angry and upset it makes me feel? my heart is all tight and everything as i right this but im too angry and upset to actually cry. i feel as if im invisible as if im not important; even my nickname on MSN is ¦¦º°WhËñéVë® Î §å¥ §õM±hïÑg ïN ®ëÅ£ï±y ïm ÎgÑô®éÐ -- ñô wØÑdë® £ÎF€ §ÛÇK§°º¦¦ (plus the bus was 15 mins late which didnt improve my mood)

well, what did i do about it u ask? well, whenever they (finally) talk to me (they're not good friends of mine), i'd pretend not to hear them speak the first time, but on the 2nd or 3rd time, i'll say "what" in an irate voice. probably doesnt change anything but oh well

one of the highlights of my day was when cindy gave me her friendship book to write in =) brooke, candice, jessie T etc. havent even wrote in it either!!! kekeke; i didnt mind carol etc. since they're bessie friends and mylee etc. cos their in more of her classes and stuff. (heidi had already written in it and she looked so cute in her piccy)

another highlight (besides the above and geography) was in lunch when diana and the rest of us and me played handball. diana and i started singing "because i got high" by afroman and "u remind me" by usher. it was real fun cos we kept singing it over and over again which annoyed jenny, jennifer, yiling, fiona, land, phuong and yiwen. kekekeke. plus you know the part in "cos i got high" where the dude starts makin chicken noises? yeah well, we did that too and i loved it cos it sounded like real chickens and like afroman! hehe, "bgerrk, bgerrk" (or something like that) better than "brooawk, broawk, broawk"! (or something like that hehe)

hopefully tomorrow'll be better (gonna keep on doing this):

1st period: maths (omg, YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
2nd period: industrial arts; computers (yea!!!! hope i can race kevin in typing again; bet i'll kick he's butt)
3rd period: history (ooooh time to hand in the essay!! besides that, yay! learning about medieval and its verrrrrrry interesting especially about the witches and all ^_~)
4th period: science (hope its the same as todays, laid-back, easy work and an easy experiment)

well need sleep i guess, 10:25 already and yeah this post is sooo long.............................bai bai pplz

20011017

tis now 10:46. i just finished my history essay for my tutor to check tomorrow =P i hate it, especially the conclusion cos u see, it's just repeating the same thing over and over again =P

my tutor's nice i guess and my co-tutor is funny, but i feel weird with them around since they're both in yr 12 and i feel as if i shouldn't even be talking to them since i don't talk to them very much and plus when christine (tran; she's my tutor as well as heidi's cousin) checks my essay i feel stupid cos i know that there's gonna have loads of things wrong and bloody hell!!

oh well, lets talk about something else....oh yeah, today, the whole 7th selective grade did [silence, then scary music] THE 1.6 KM RUN!!!!!!!!!

awwwww man, my legs and thighs still hurt!!! i got 12:26 mins meaning i decreased by 41 secs =P (last time was 11:45 mins but then again, the guy keeping track of my score thought i already did 6 instead of only doing 5)

man, kevin was practically ZOOOOOOOOOOMING when he started!! it was like, nyarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr like a car! but then he got slower...and slower...and slower...and finally to a walk, but then he started to run again during his last lap. khoa and kenson were really good cos kenson got 7:07 and i dunno about khoa but i think he got 7:16 or something. probably cos they both have good endurance and jogged the whole way......but dunno.......

tomorrow is a much more relaxing day since we have:

1st period: visual arts (lino prints, yay!! [i think])
2nd period: science (hmmm....experiements i hope, with not report writing)
3rd period: english (yay!!!!!! plus we're making an ad for a new product and a new brand -- ubuf!!! [pronounced ooooo-buff])
4th period: geography (groan groan groan, lets hope for a substitute!! if so, then i can muck around more with lisa and leesa and make up answers for textbook thingys!! hehehe)

oh yeah, im starting on the new layout.......and also, PLEASE APPLY FOR HOSTING; INTERACT MORE AND SIGN THE GUESTBOOK!!!!!!!!

20011015

yawn yawn yawn, my eyes are so sleepy....probably cos of the fact that i had only approx. 7 hours and 45 mins. gonna have more sleep tonight so i can stay awake in maths **yawns again**

i dunno how the speech went but ben says i was reading to farkin' fast!! ARGH!!!! oh wells, just hope i get higher than my score before which was BAAAAAAAD!! oh wells, shouldn't dwell on the past and plus u ppl must be so very bored from hearing me babble =P

guess what? i've got a new idea for a new layout.....tis gonna be of shiri appleby and jason behr, you know? ummmmmmmmmmm max and liz from roswell. they're such a cute couple, but i have to admit i prefer michael and maria instead. oh wells (sayin' that too much) it'll come along fine (if i can get it to be like that). i hate this layout so yeah............

today at P.E., we did fitness testing.....did it at the beginning of the year, but we have to do it again and so yeah.....we did sit-ups, standing long-jump and this thing where we have to reach to see how far we can stretch (or somethin' likewise). here are me scores (with comments courtsey of me):

sit-ups -- 100 (same as term 1; i'm actually pretty good at sit-ups cos i them a lot)
standing long-jump -- 158/4 cm (i think i got better than term one, but i'm not sure)
stretching thing -- +1 (i decreased =[ last year i had +3)

our seating plan for english changed again and now i'm in the table to the corner right. the seats are like this (_ and | is one table):
patricia tan
\ /
| |
_ _ | <-- ben
_ _ | <-- brooke
^ ^
| |
n/a me

i like sitting next to brooke; tan's okay cos he's mostly quiet and ben's okay too, sometimes annoying, but mostly funny ^_~ anyhoo, yeah, that's for today

Hmmmm..........................tis now 6:39 am on Monday, the first day of Term 4...sighs....I am so so so so so so so so so so scared about this speech I have to give in English today. Just like Mia in Princess Diaries....I just hope I won't run away and throw up.

but yeah, you know? speechs are like a phobia of mine.....what do you call a speech phobia? oh wells, I'll find out sooner or later.

One of the reasons I got up soo early today was because I woke up at six and couldn't get back to sleep cos my next door neighbour's birds were too loud. bloody hell. oh well, at least I can print out some nicholas tse piccys for leesa and practise my speech as well...butterflies are fluttering around my stomach....i just hope i get a better score than my last speech -- that was a disaster man, i got a friggin C minus!!!!!!!! lowest mark i ever got in english....C would be okay, C plus would be better and i'd looooove to get B minus!!

oh wells, i better go now, get ready for school, practice my speech and get freaked out at the same time =S

20011013

well well wells....my cousin sandy seems to be pissed at me again. geeze, what'd up her ass? i mean, i did absolutely NOTHING wrong to her in the past month but for some reason she has a grudge against me. oh well, you can never tell with girl cousins who look and act like guys (don't mean to sound bitchy)

aunt sarah, jessica, sandy and i went to watch The Princess Diaries and it was great! Anne Hathaway is such a good actress and Mandy Moore was really good in the movie too!! even though her character, Lana, was a bit of a bitch, she played her well and i liked listening to her sing "stupid cupid". overall, it was good.

i washed the car with aunt sarah and sandy and this is what i think of who did the most washing and stuff: me, then aunt then sandy. i mean, sandy just whipped around a lil, then went off to play with calvin. GEEZE!! aunt was okay, she almost beat me in the doing stuff, but yeah.....aunt joanne also took us to eat burger king and it was actually quite cool.

you know what i spent last night doing? i stayed up till around 2:20 printing out posters of BENNY CHAN!! i now have one of him in my brand new wallet as well as one of my family. a picture of him is on my computer monitor and one is on the wall.....sigh, the picture i chose of him is him in a polive uniform (which he wore during "Anti-Crime Squad") and he's giving a thumbs up and grinning he's smile. Oh my gosh, whenever i look at it, I smile myself and giggle and feel completely happy.

The ending of Princess Diaries keep replying in my mind.....Michael (this guy whose pretty cute) whose liked Mia (Anne Hathaway) and vice versa kisses her -- her first real kiss -- and her left leg kinda pops, like in those old-fashioned movies. She's always wanted that to happen and when she pops her leg, it hits this switch and lights and fountains open and it's just beautiful.......how romantic (kekeke)

anyhoo, i am definitely gonna make a new layout and the subject it might be of is.........BENNY CHAN!!!

20011012

hmmmm long while (at least to me) since i blogged here! Today is Friday (duh, you might be thinking) but i only have three more days (including today) until the holidays are over! =( Bloody hell man, school's back on Monday, but the good thing is, I'd get to see Diana and stuff again! =) But then, there's a speech we have to do in english on Monday as well as a history essay due on friday...hmm....that's okay, I spose, since history is one of my best subjects but speech! urgh.......

Better think positively, Serena, or else you'll be moaning and whining for the rest of the holidays.....don't want that happening! Anyways, yesterday, brooke and I went to out little shopping trip at liverpool westfields and it was fun! i was wearing a demin skirt and i still couldn't stop feeling and saying how uncomfortable it was =P Oh wells, if you lift the left side up a teeny bit, it's better

I bought Lisa's and Leesa's birthday pressie there, but right now, I just need to buy them a card and some wrapping paper! I bought the pressies at morning glory since that's a pretty good shop to buy presents. brooke bought yiling her present there as well. i also bought a nice waller (equip), a pin for breast cancer foundation (pink ribbon day), a lovely silver ring, a snoopy writing file, writing paper and envelopes; and stickers and this treasure box thing for jessica and eric. (couldn't find any clothing i liked =\) brooke bought a pair of caramel cords which she went nuts over, aiman's anniversery pressie for jessie T, a lancombe pack her sister gave her money to buy, a 112 single (peaches and cream) and some other stuff, I think, but i probably forgot.

It was actually RAINING when we were ready to go home. brooke had left her mobile at home, so daddy couldn't call her and arrange where we should meet him, so we took the train instead =/ we had to buy an umbrella cos it was raining hard and walk all the way to liverpool station (wasn't that far). we asked directions of this lady at the info center, but her directions SUCKED! we got kinda lost, so we asked this woman working in a chinese shop, but she just said to walk straight back down were we came from (some help).

finally, we went to this surfing store and a real nice man helped us out and told us the correct directions. when we arrived and bought tickets, brooke reckoned we missed the train, but in fact, we came just in time for this train going to the city which stopped at our station so we took that train. and after taking the train, we took the bus home and yeah, that was our adventure =) it was great, especially at one time when we went to target and we were in the (YUCK) winnie-the-pooh section. of course, i started strangling some winnie toys (even writing the fat ugly bear's name down kills me). brooke grabbed a tigger toy and pretended to bash me up with it.

so i grabbed a eeyore pupper and bashed tigger up. at the end, tigger chucked himself at eeyore and piglet came to the rescure (huh). my beautiful eeyore creamed piglet of course and yeah, i don't think i'll ever forget our puppet fight =)

I also applied for some awards (please vote for me when voting season starts!!) and for some reviews as well as joining a bunch of cliques/fanlistings =) sign the guestbook too, please!! ^_~

20011010

yes!!!! yay it works, it works! ^_^ happy day!

20011009

testing, testing......does this work? plz plz plz let it work!!!!!!